Sream of consciousness can suck it.

Can we all get on-board that stream of consciousness writing sucks to do and sucks to read? Honestly, what is the point? Why does rambling for a finite and often predetermined amount of time  reveal my unconscious desires? Seriously, incoherent pen marks, an achy hand and the slowest passing of 20 minutes EVER is going to reveal to me what my life's meaningful contribution will be, or what dark murkiness is keeping the 'universe' from revealing the love of my life to me? All I want to do is releave the burning tension in my arm, borne of holding the pen too firmly. I want to judge myself for misspelling the word 'relieve' or whatever. Maybe if I take on this little writing exercise while sitting in a dark Capitol Hill cafe while indie/jazz/electronica/bluegrass fusion plays in the background, I'll be able to dip deeper into the hidden realms of my intellect and rational mind so that I might finally prove to myself that I am actually smart and could do something traditionally prestigious like go to medical school, instead of being $30,000 in debt to become...wait for it...an office manager for a fledgling non-profit. 

Maybe the value of stream of consciousness writing lies in the fact that it is so fucking boring that you end up having to really dig deep into your creative faculties in order to find a way to make the process even the slightest bit more bearable. "Oh God, okay, what can I think about...ooh, Jake Gyllenhaall, unicorns, Jake Gyllenhaal riding a unicorn? Ooh, and he's shirtless. And, has a beard. Oh, he baked me cookies." Seriously. "See, this isn't so bad. Isn't this interesting?" NO. It just fucking ISN'T! Oh and the therapists/life coaches/spiritual guides love to shove it down your throat:

 Therapist: 
"Now, what I'd like you to do is to wake up each morning, and before you do anything else, grab a notebook, or journal or pad of paper, anything will do, and write whatever comes to mind. This exercise is called 'Morning Pages'. It's an intentional way of starting one's day."

SEE Captain: 
"Seriously? No, but really? That's what you've got for me, huh? Did you learn that at Harvard Med? You're what...$200,00 in debt and that's the advice you have for me? Well, let me give you a bit of advice: Stop it. Just fucking stop it. You've officially blown any credibility you had because, guess what? 'Morning Pages' or whatever stupid term you're trying to coin (by the way, are you comfortable with the fact that that's the legacy you're leaving to the world of Psychology?) is some bullshit. That shit is boring. There you go, BAM! $30,000. Western Washington University. Now go fuck yourself. I'm out."

ARGH.